What You Say is So, Even When it Is Not
Feb 25,2005 12:00
by
Silver
Part Of the Change Your Focus, Change Your Life Series
By Silver Rose
Suppose you interpret a co-worker?s actions as meaning he doesn?t respect you. Unwilling to simply speculate, you ask him. Surprised by the question he answers, Actually, quite the opposite is true. Im envious of your skill.
If you dont ask, then you do not have his respect - youve made it so with your words. In your world, he disrespects you - even when he doesnt.
The Law of Attraction says, You attract what you focus on. Your focus is generated with words, even if they are only spoken inside your head:
That driver is a jerk. Youre right!
My boss hates me. Youre right!
I'll never get a promotion. Youre right!
Why does it have to be this difficult? Youre right!
I never get a break. Youre right!
Doo dah, doo dah.
Were so careless with our words. I catch myself saying things like, I just want to ask a question. With that one four-letter qualifier, I announce to the world that my question doesnt matter.
How often we hear people say, Im only the receptionist, or Dont ask me; nobody tells me anything. Words strung together in sentences guaranteed to keep the speakers powerless.
We create our reality through description. One person has a cute little cottage that another would describe as a dump. Johnny thinks the boss is a motivating leader while Jill regards her as a phony. One person thinks the work is challenging and interesting while his co-worker claims that its too hard and a waste of her talent.
If a Martian landed here tomorrow and asked three people about the head of your organization, he might get three very different descriptions:
Hes an idiot
Hes a great leader, or
Hes a kiss-up
All of the above are descriptions of the same person. Which one is the truth? In your world, he is whichever one you say with your words even if hes not.
Think about the work that you do. Was there ever a time when you enjoyed it? It was once fascinating. Now its too complicated. It was once a challenge. Now its too difficult. What changed? Some people would say your attitude. But, before there was attitude, there were words that fed the flames of that attitude.
We have the opportunity, in every moment, to create heaven or hell. It all starts with words.
Helen Keller had no world until she had words. Without sight or sound, she had only feeling and no way to differentiate anything in her world. She behaved like an animal because, without words, she had only instinct.
Once Annie Sullivan unlocked her darkness with words, Helen Keller had a life. And she created that life with her words.
I can see, and that is why I can be so happy in what you call the dark, but which to me is golden. I can see a God-made world, not a man-made world."
Helen Keller
Helen Keller created the world she wanted, not the world that was handed to her. Her consistent message was that we each have the opportunity to do the same. For her, it all started with words, as it did for all of us.
What you say is so, even when its not.
Silver Rose works with organizations who want to develop self-managed and happy employees and with individuals who want to love their work. visit http://www.silverspeaks.com/
She can be reached at