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Today was an upsetting day. My sister went in for her ultrasound this morning to find out whether they'd be having another boy or if it'd be a girl. They ended up finding out that the baby has a flat head. The skull won't fully develop to cover the brain, it will stop at the baby's eyes. It apparently has something to do with spina bifidus or something to that effect. They wanted her to basically have an abortion since the baby won't live, but she is going to carry him full term to hopefully let him get one moment of life. I found all of this out on my lunch break, I was an emotional mess! They've named him Gideon. If he makes it through delivery, he'll live for a max of 5 minutes.
Ok, I need to go, I need to sleep. I also found out today that I'm anemic, or however you spell it! I had blood work done last week, the lab results came in today, I was so worried that it would all be bad news, but it wasn't. They mentioned a few other things, but they are going to run a couple more tests just to make sure. I reckon I'll find out more when I go in to see my doc after the holiday.
I need to meditate, then sleep. The next several months are going to be emotional. It's so hard b/c now instead of buying clothes and toys and a crib and all that stuff for the baby, we have to plan for the funeral and get a little casket and all of that. It's sooooooooo sad. Ok, I just need to shut up and go to bed.
~ONE~

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