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So I haven't been here much the last few months not sure what my activity will be over the next few months either..it's been a few rough months for me so i haven't really been on the computer all that much....I hope you are all doing well I hope to be back around here real soon...

take care

Cindy

So been gone some time from here. been a long few weeks i must say. needed some time to think and some alone time to figure out what it is that i want. and guess what still don't know what that is. don't think i will ever know what it is i'm looking for. but I come to terms with that. I am who i am faults and all. the good the bad and the ugly. I am not perfect nor will i ever be I am just me. I need to learn to accept me for who i have become. and be happy that i am here and alive. so that is what i'm going to do. Get up enjoy the day that i have been given and soak up the sun. A new year has been given to me and i intend to take full advantage of it. Have a wonderful day everyone.

I'm sitting here wondering how this days has turned out so crappy wishing I could go back to bed and wake up and start things over anew and better. take back some things that have been said and restore a relationship that is slipping through my fingers. how sad it makes me feel to know that by the the end of tomorrow a friendship will be gone and I'll be left here sitting wondering why.

So the holidays are coming up on me faster then I would like. Sorry i have not been around much and probably wont be around much until after the new year. This is such a busy time with family coming and going and trying to get ready for Christmas I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas I'll be around off and on but not much. have a wonderful weekend

I received this in an email and wanted to share it with you all. i don't think i could have said it better..........................................
As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.
Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.

Life.......
Life is a game of forgetting and remembering.
You are losing the game when you forget who you are and what you are doing here; remember the false things of the past and what they did to you. You are winning the game when you remember your true identity of peace, remember God who is always peaceful and has unconditional love for you. Forget troubles of the past and move forward with the lessons learned.
Observe what you remember during the day and what you forget during the day. Forget the past, it is gone. Don't worry about the future. You do not know it. Learn to live in the present and discover how full it is of peaceful moments.

Thank you to all who have left me comments of the last few days. We went away on Friday Morning to take our youth group to the Missouri State Youth convention. It was awesome nothing like spending the weekend with 600 teenagers. how inspiring they were to see their faith and love. Made me look at some things in my life in a whole new way. but now i'm so tired from the weekend that i'm finding it hard today to be on the computer for very long. need to catch up on some much needed sleep seeing how we didn't sleep AT ALL while we were gone. LOL! The band that lead our worship was awesome they are working on a record deal and i really hope they get it. they call themselve Waiting Tables (awesome music) we got a chance to talk to them Found out that my husband went to college with the bass player Jacob. well enoung rambles from me. I must leave soon.

Have a wonderful evening

So I sat down here with the intentions of writing and getting the thoughts that are running through my head out so that maybe i could have a few minutes of peace but guess that is not going to happen. I can not gather them into intelligible sentences that would be understood by any who would have read them. so i leave my fragmemnt thoughts to float around in the abyss and darkness of my head................

Happiness
It is the art of living, the purpose of our existence. Happiness is the true index of quality of life. Without happiness, life is dry and meaningless. With happiness, life immediately becomes fulfilling and wonderful. Happiness is an infectious feeling that immediately lifts the sagging spirits of people. Happy people keep themselves happy because they know the little ways to appreciate themselves and to see the humour and magic in each moment.
(I wish I felt this way today^^)

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