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Yay I can get on here now :)
I hope everyone has had a wonderful new year so far!
I don't really have much to say hope everyone is well! :)

I found this poem one night a long time ago and ran across it the other day...It makes me very sad, but people sometimes don't realize it happens so often...

Standing in the darkness,
Fear twined in with tears of shame,
She doesn't know what it is she did,
But she knows it had to be bad,
To deserve to be punished this way,
She sinks against the wall,
Tears finally starting to fall,
From beneath her swollen eyes,
She hears the front door open,
And then slammed shut in rage,
As her father yells out to her,
She cowers deeper in the closet,
As he barges in and grabs her hair,
Dragging her out as she pleads to him,
"Please let me go daddy,
I don't know what it is I did,
But I promise to be good,
Just daddy please don't hit me anymore!"
He disregards her pleas,
As he slaps her hard across the face,
She reels back,
Falling to the ground,
Scrambling to get away,
As he takes his belt,
And begins to beat her small already broken body,
Until she is inaches from her death,
And in her mind she prays to God,
To give her wings to get away,
As she takes in her last breath,
And the pain is finally ceased.
~Unknown~

As we sit many years from now,
Talking of what we remember,
Of trees and of forests,
Where animals ran free,
And the leaves turn to the color of flames,
At that special time of year,
But our children will sit,
With a look of bewilderment,
As if we are talking of a fairytale,
That could not possibly be true,
And the oldest will look up,
With the sadest look in his eyes and ask,
"Mommy, Daddy what happened to all the forests?"

Why is Hollywood allowed to take tru events and exploit them in movies?
I don't know how many people know or have even heard of the new movie that came out Friday called Alpha Dog, but this movie is based on true events. Events that no one should see what they put this poor boy (Nick I believe was his name if that is his name in the movie or not I don't know) through. My fiance knew the real person that it is about. The movie tells the story of three drug dealers or something to that degree who kidnap Nick because his older brother owes the three money...and once they realize what they have done and that they could go to jail for life they made Nick dig his own grave and then shot him. How can Hollywood be allowed to take something as precious as someone's life and exploit this to millions of people just to make money? They don't even tell in the trailers that it is based on actual events....Hollywood makes me sick.

I'm at school listening to a band called the Trinidad Steel Band it is very good music, it's reggae and calypso which normally aren't my types of music but I really enjoy this, and getting extra credit for coming and listening then writng a report isn't half bad either.

On another note I'm very happy that things are falling in to order. My fiancee and I are trying to figure out the best way/time to announce to everyone in our family that we are engaged and have set a date. We know they will be happy just shocked especially my parents because he and I have not been together that long and are already planning our wedding....which the planning is basically done we just have to go through with the vows and everything else. I can't help but smile every time I think of it but I do worry about what my parents will say because I know they see me as too young, but by the time I get married I will be 22 and to me that is a fine age to get married if you know you love the person and I do. Too many thoughts go rushing through my mind...I should really stop over analyzing everything! But I hope everyone had a great Thursday and hope they have a fun and safe weekend!
Star

Hello everyone. I have not gotten on here in a very long time because everything has been very hectic and I have to get my internet fixed at home. Life is changing quickly it seems like and the new year is starting to rush by already. Classes started back yesterday and it's already hectic, doing all the homework plus planning a wedding is really getting to me already and it is only the second day of classes. But anyway I have to get ready to go to class so I have to leave this at that.
Star

I haven't been on here in awhile. School has been hectic trying to get everything done before finals start Monday, and on top of all of that wonderfulness I got the flu although my doctor made me get the flu shot...some good that did. I hope everyone is having a great December so far and hope their Christmas goes well! I think I am getting off of here for now to figure out something to so for this flu.

Has something ever just bothered you to the point of no end? My stomach keeps getting tied in knots and it shouldn't be...I know mistakes are made, but can you ever just forget them? I mean TRULY forget them? I know I made a HUGE mistake last night, but I don't know what to do....or what to say. I'm only human people cannot expect me to be perfect, but they do and it is not fair. I never asked to be perfect in anyone's eyes, I never asked for attention that I didn't want, I never asked for anything, but to be happy. That is all I want to be happy and not worry about what the rest of the world thinks...It isn't fair to do that to yourself.....

Happy Halloween everyone! Hope everyone has a fun/safe time at parties!
But anyway, I went to my doctor a few days ago and he told me I wasn't pregnant sadly so I still have to wait for my baby. I guess that isn't too bad with having school and everything else that I have to do lately so in away I guess it is for the better...and at least it isn't another miscarriage I don't think I could handle that.
StarAngel

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